This post is co-authored by Brian Honigman and Michael Roderick
We’ve made major strides in recent years towards equality, but LGBTQ entrepreneurs and employees still face many roadblocks to success in the professional world.
A 2011 report from Williams Institute highlighted that 42% of LGB respondents had experienced workplace discrimination on the basis of their sexual orientation in their career, while another 2011 report from the National Center for Transgender Equality found that 90% of transgender people surveyed experienced harassment or mistreatment on the job.
While it’s likely this level of harassment has fallen in recent years, it’s more important than ever that everyone work together to help make the workplace more welcoming.
One variable that impacts a person’s likelihood to decide to disclose their sexual orientation or gender identity at work is the support of heterosexual colleagues, according to Emir Ozeren and Alper Aslan’s chapter of Sexual Orientation and Transgender Issues in Organizations, an anthology compiled by Thomas Köllen.
Here are few tips on how to become an ally for LGBTQ entrepreneurs and co-workers from my experience as a gay entrepreneur and from Michael Roderick, my straight colleague, entrepreneur and master connector.
Encourage inclusion in activities and avoid stereotypes. Office activities can be an amazing way for everyone to get to know one another, but it’s also very easy for them to become events that exclude your LGBTQ colleagues. The main way this happens is with stereotypes.
When inviting colleagues to events, be aware of the stereotypes that you may believe in and that others aren’t addressing. This is where it’s important to question your assumptions about who would “like” a particular activity.
It’s easy to exclude a colleague from an invite to watch a game by assuming they don’t like sports or would be too sensitive to go to that standup comedy show, but you won’t know anyone’s preference until you invite them.
Know the difference between empathy and sympathy. In lieu of the recent tragedy in Orlando, your natural inclination may be to say as much as you can to a LGBTQ colleague to show your support. It’s very easy to get caught in the trap of treating them like a victim and not treating them like a person.
The flip side of this is staying silent. After a major event, it may feel uncomfortable to say anything, but even a few words to show you acknowledge what happened can go a long way.
Remember that as much as we think we can understand what another person is going through, we do not have the same life that they do and assumptions can be very dangerous. It’s best to start with a small sentence or two of acknowledgement and let the other person choose to open up or not.
Educate yourself with the help of coworkers. Being informed about the nuances of the LGBTQ community can make you a stronger ally. Do your research on what questions are not appropriate to ask like what surgeries a transgender colleague has had, as well as the history behind the LGBTQ civil rights movement to date.
The Human Rights Campaign, GLAAD and the ACLU are a few of the many resources you can reference to learn about the LGBTQ community. No two people are alike, so in many cases it is best to ask your colleagues directly about their experience being themselves, but with a respectful tone and willingness to learn how you can continue to support them.
Diversify your networking. Seek out other entrepreneurs or people at your company that share a different background than you to alter your perspective and provide support to others that are underrepresented.
Take the first step and reach out to an LGBTQ colleague and learn about their experience as a business owner or as a fellow employee. You’ll be surprised by what you’ve got in common, as well as how your differences make you a stronger resource for one another.
Having a diverse network can help all parties be better decision makers throughout their careers and provide LGBTQ professionals with allies to rely on as they navigate their industry.
Language is powerful. Provide day-to-day encouragement of your LGBTQ coworkers by calling attention to their accomplishments and amplifying their voices, but also by helping defend them if inappropriate situations arise. Many jokes and comments that are considered homophobic still linger in the world.
From someone referring to something they don’t like as “gay” to school children using the phrase “No Homo” when one boy says something nice about another boy, many of these phrases and jokes slip by easily in the workplace as “just a joke.”
If you hear someone say something derogatory about a colleague as a joke, remind them that it’s not funny and that it can actually be hurtful. These are some of the tougher conversations to have, because some will see you as being “too P.C.” or picking a fight. It’s important to start bringing attention to the small comments as they often grow into bigger problems.
Lastly, be reflective about your own language. It’s really easy for phrases you used as a child to make their way into your adult life without ever questioning how others may take it when you say them.
Get out of your comfort zone and take action. It’s one thing to call yourself an ally and another thing to act like one. Don’t let your support be passive. Identify opportunities to show your support for your colleagues by joining an employee resource group, taking part in the Pride parade or participating in a run or walk that raises money for an LGBTQ cause.
Be aware of your privilege as a heterosexual and/or cisgender person when visiting LGBTQ safe spaces and continue to monitor the way you’re discussing related issues and your role as an ally to assure you’re speaking for yourself and that you’re not making assumptions for others.
By showing that you are willing to show your support with more than just words, you are confirming that you are interested and invested in the discussion around LGBTQ rights and most importantly, willing to invest your time to help make changes.
Michael Roderick is the founder of Small Pond Enterprises, which helps entrepreneurs think carefully about relationship building. He is also the co-host of the podcast Access to Anyone.
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