To the Editor:
Re “They Were My Friends for Years. Trump Tore Us Apart,” by Art Cullen (Opinion guest essay, Feb. 8):
I must thank Art Cullen for his beautifully rendered piece that speaks to one of the tragedies in the wake of the Trump presidency. This loss of friendship is a divide that is often forgotten in the wider lens of politics, reducing the Trump effect into red and blue states, Republicans and Democrats.
Mr. Cullen reminds us that the ugly impact of the Trump years is more granular, chipping away at even lifelong friendships before making the cracks too wide to heal. Of all the meanspirited excesses of the former president, perhaps this is the most unforgivable.
Paul Thaler
Bronx
To the Editor:
Art Cullen describes the loss of friends due to political differences between them. He describes himself as “woke.” He doesn’t say who broke off the friendships, but it’s been my experience, and those of friends of mine, that those on the left are much more likely to shun and shut out friends and acquaintances with conservative views than the other way around.
“If you vote for Trump I can’t talk to you anymore!” I have heard that many times, after only pointing out that Donald Trump has done some good things — not that I support him. The left has a terrible inability to countenance differing viewpoints in my experience.
Justin Cohen
Cedarhurst, N.Y.
To the Editor:
I look at people differently now.
For most of my life (and it now stretches into its eighth decade) I believed that the overwhelming majority of people were fundamentally good. At least they were pointed in the right direction, even if they were sometimes rough around the edges.
But with the insinuation of Donald Trump into our lives and our brains I no longer harbor such positive assumptions for the rest of humanity. Now, my default position is if you have abiding love for Donald Trump, you are a deeply flawed individual.
He has poisoned the well, made me question the basic nature of humanity. If there is one thing beyond all others that makes me so furious with Mr. Trump, it is that he has stolen my rose-colored glasses.
I now look at far too many with jaundiced eyes, no longer seeing them in their best light, but tinted now by my belief about the hardness of their heart and the shallowness of their thought.
They do not deserve such reprobation. And I do not deserve to have my perception of our innate goodness ripped away.
But such is the lasting terrible legacy wrought by a man who has done nothing but make this the divided and diminished state of America.
Robert S. Nussbaum
Fort Lee, N.J.
To the Editor:
Thanks to Art Cullen for his sensitive and insightful guest essay. He eloquently described the heartbreaking isolation and resulting sadness that are the true legacies of our former president. I have lost friends also, but I’ve also lost any enjoyment I ever had reading the paper, listening to the radio or watching the news on TV. It’s news about Trump 24/7.
And he loves it. In my opinion, he could not care less about actually helping our country or any of his followers. He just wants to be the center of attention.
Chandler Rosenberger
Suwanee, Ga.
Is the Red-Blue Divide Overblown?
To the Editor:
Re “Toby Keith Was an Enigma Wrapped in a Riddle Wrapped in the Flag” (Opinion guest essay, Feb. 10):
In his tribute to the country singer Toby Keith, Michael Patrick F. Smith notes that Mr. Keith performed for both Barack Obama and Donald Trump. His crossover appeal is telling of something broader and even heartwarming.
Our research consistently reveals there’s more common ground among Americans than one would ever guess from what’s happening in the capital or on social media. National polling for our new Connection Index, for instance, shows that 76 percent of Americans see good in those they disagree with, 71 percent have a friend who doesn’t share their views and 57 percent think the “culture wars” are overblown.
No wonder Mr. Keith’s fan base defied the neat red and blue divide.
Will Johnson
Chicago
The writer is C.E.O. of The Harris Poll.
The Tiresome ‘Mean Girl’ Trope
To the Editor:
Re “‘Mean Girls’ Has Lost Its Bite. Girls Haven’t,” by Jessica Bennett (Opinion, Feb. 3):
Having served as the head of two girls’ schools, one on the East Coast and one on the West, I not only disagree with Ms. Bennett, but also question the authenticity of a small subset of girls as a national trend.
I have observed just the opposite from my students over 26 years. I have found them to be thoughtful and caring and deeply involved in their world, always looking for ways to communicate with one another and with their teachers as they wrestle with complex problems with nuance and compassion. They care about racial inequity, climate change, gun control and politics as they search for ways to bridge cultural and political divides, while finding ways to communicate with one another.
I graduated from a girls school in 1965, and even back then there were cliques and cruelties, as there have always been. But I have lived long enough to see so many of my classmates and former students grow into smart and caring women.
I am weary of the mean girl trope, as it smacks of a deeply rooted misogyny, pitting girls against one another. My professional life spent in the company of girls has been a joy and an honor. In fact, I would put all of my hope for our fractured country’s future in their hands.
Priscilla Sands
Los Angeles
Vote for Problem Solvers, Not Complainers
To the Editor:
It seems that we are taking rather unsatisfactory means to select our government officers. We have been choosing the candidates who show the most advanced skill in complaining and blaming other people. We have chosen some doozies.
I would suggest that the qualities we should be selecting for should be those more beneficial to the people and to the state and the country.
It would be better to vote for folks who could solve problems. The two skill sets — complaining and blaming vs. problem solving — don’t really complement each other.
Next time you are at a candidate forum, listen to how much time the aspirants spend on each approach to governance. Then you can decide whom you would rather have leading us. I personally won’t vote for anyone who only complains about other candidates and can’t come up with ways to solve problems we are all experiencing.
Dan Shissler
Ellensburg, Wash.
Backyard Skating Rinks
To the Editor:
Re “Let’s Go Ice Skating. In the Backyard” (Real Estate, Feb. 11):
Spend $12,000 for a backyard skating rink? Good Lord! In the 1930s my dad used his garden hose to create a skating rink in the empty lot next to our house on Notre Dame Street in Hudson Falls, N.Y. Cost: $0. The ice was a little rough, but we kids had wonderful times skating and playing hockey.
Jack Buchanan
New York
